Кевин - Polynesian Sass

Batty boy, I travelling through a box!

Chest Hair

The Amazing Weeks of Our Lives

Nothing like a journey on the Noctilien to get your juices flowing and that extra "you ain't going to sleep anytime soon" shot of adrenaline, you neither want or need.

Having had a pretty major bout of "hate my life" it's been nice to have some good times out recently, of course my already stressed bank balance could do without me having these times.  But quite frankly fuck it and fuck you.

I've been pretty much down all the time, days off are times I try and sleep through the events that I find myself in trying to reconcile everything to get back on some sort of plateau of normality, of course with very limited success.  I'm pretty much certain I am lost and I barely know where I start to try and get myself out of this.

Most of the time I try to avoid being depressively sad and of course making it apparent that I am (because who wants to go out with that bitch who cries on the dance floor to I Got a Feeling), more so that I find it utterly fucking annoying being that guy.  I need change, I need to change this situation.  I have good friends, good friends who in their right mind, I'm fairly sure, just want to punch me square in the face for being this run down by all this.

I am also in a city that makes me happy and that I enjoy being in, quite frankly this paradox is really starting to make my brain hurt.  Yet I try and move on with little success, but I will get out of this some how.  And when I do, I will be unstoppable.

But until then, I will be that chick with mascara running down her face banging down tequila shots and demanding her hair be held while she barfs up old stories of all the crap she just needs to set behind her.  Because like that chick, I give things to people who shouldn't deserve it and then seem perplexed when it gets returned, smashed to pieces.

Like that chick I also write half-tired bullshit on an electronic journal, because you know, I'm totally that #hashtag.


Sometimes we must.

Having spent the last 15 hours sleeping, I'm not entirely sure why I'm so tired. But I am and therefore I can't make brain.

I've had some good nights recently, until Photomaton stole 4€ from us. But what can you do right? If we followed the life of Binah then we'd kick it (which incidentally is what happened, a Photomaton booth got roughed up).

I've also had bad nights, so I've decided to stop drinking for a bit. It seems logical. On the bright side my consumption of soft drinks has sky rocketed and you can certainly take this opportunity to invest in Coca-Cola shares in knowledge that you will see returns.

Incidentally in my tired state I think I might have lost my carte bleue but I can't be too sure. But for now, I'm off to take a shower and blissfully walk out in to the "outside world" in a haze of "I'm still pretty tired". God speed.


Dear LiveJournal, I believe I have sinned.

I have really started to get back in to another service recently, she is called Kakao Talk, the Korean messaging service we all like to send naff emojis on.

With this new found glee at messaging, I of course have now fell back in to blissful love with the rather cool mobile based journal-cum-blog app Kakao Story, you can view mine here, but for some reason the web version is only in Korean (where as the apps are in English also).

It's pretty nifty, but it ain't LiveJournal nifty.  But then again this is like saying "it's not cheating if you use a condom", so I must accept that I have cheated on LiveJournal. #sadface

I even have created a group on Kakao Group like some kind of crazed Koreaboo looking for K-Pop on Napster (before the whole got shutdown and relauched as a pile of steaming shit).  I'm about 10% sure this link here will let you join it, if not Kakao me on id: kdwc and I can do the whole invite thing.

But of course I still use the LiveJournal without a doubt to write utter crap like this, so clearly this is my stable marriage as I go off having numerous affairs hoping one day too never be caught.  But secretly, LiveJournal knows and this is why I love her so.


Parisiens next door have seen my underwear.

I've been gleefully looking back at my posts from the past few months and noticed how sporratic they have been.  Dear LiveJournal, I have not fell out of love with you, I've just been busy and such like.

I guess I better blog about something or I can't call myself a Blogger any more.  And quite frankly, my shallow ego couldn't take that kind of brusing.

What's been up in my life as an old hat Parisien type?  Well so much of course, this is Paris after all!  For those of you that can see it, I made a post not too long ago about somethings that have been occuring, they hadn't been getting any better either.  Somewhat filled with anxiety and according to the paperwork stress visable.

Obviously I need to find a way out of this situation and of course this is where my borderline annoying LiveJournalling comes back in to fashion, much like a sleezy T Shirt you don't have the mental ability to set fire to (even though by fashion standards, you probably should).  So fuck you Jean-Paul Gautier, I'm wearing this mother fucker in the daylight.

I will write something on the downlow at some point, as I should probably capture this time in the blog that followed me grow up from back in the 2000s; as to be able to look on it fondly, like a smell in a elevator, perhaps of the fart variety.

But with the negatives come positives, as the universe is so well at dishing salty water upon a wound as it buys you a round of cocktails in some upscale hotel.  And the biggest positive of them all, happens to be feelings of the pleasant variety.

I met somebody, in a bar no less, we had a chat and exchanged numbers as is the custom in western society now days.  But where this lead I almost half expected.  We volleyed text messages for a couple hours and I received a message with an invite chez lui.  We performed the ritual of conversation by way of lip based contact, things happened of course, as nature will attest to.

But during this time we talked, spent all night together, did some more nature based things and conversed until the point that could not be stopped.  Namely the Eurostar timetable.  He had to go back to Londres.

But we seemed to have left a mark on eachother, as we're pretty much talking daily now, through the magical method of text based communications.  With these things you can never fully tell, but I'm beginning to believe perhaps some kind of emotional connection is occuring.  Yes my readers from long and a far, it appears I may have these 'feels' your cat memes express so eloquently.

Only time can really tell if this is what it is, but he's back in Paris in September and arranged a hotel of the elegant variety as to spent quite literally all day and night in.  I'm not going to lie when I say this place better have room service, but if I can't get an overpriced sandwich in my underwear, I will be absolutely livid.  #middleclassproblems

I may or may not be reading in to this correctly, but this isn't the kind of thing you sort out for some two bit booty call.  And god knows I'm of that variety.  And you know what, if it is as it seems, it gives me that kind of fuzzy feeling you get when you hit your toe on a table in the dark, then proceed to smash that table around because, GOD DAMN IT WHY ARE YOU BEING A DICK INANIMATE OBJECT?!?!?

This is how life rolls you see good and bad feels at once, my stress level is not that sure how much life shortening stress hormone it should be pumping me full of.  And you know what, at the moment I'm pretty cool with that.


Life Update: Quick like cos I ain't got battery.

1) Worst Threesome Ever. But I got shit loads of tequila. Trade off.

2) Now dealt with the Police Nationale more than three times. Hello judicial system.

3) I have Mr Marriage Material returning to Paris in three weeks. We will make mojitos.


@DrFNFurter makes most awesome post

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You can't take the faux-wife anywhere.

For some reason Instagram didn't repost this, but yesterday after consuming enough sushi to demolish the fish population of an ocean.

Me and Dan headed in to FNAC with a litre of sangria and two beers already down, to search for home wears.

I'm fairly certain I can add FNAC Bercy Village to the list of "places we might not be welcome in".

But who cares our up coming apartment will look so awesome with everything on the list, oh and the incredibly racist kitchen ware I demanded we have. So hipster.

Cheerleader Cherie

FG au Grand Palais

Parce que j'ai fatigué (ok ok j'ai eu sous l'affluence d'alcool toute de soirée), voici une photo d'hier soir.

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J'ai téléchargé un album sur Google+. En quelques heures je vais la même chose sur LiveJournal.

Tchao tchao.


I wanted to go to Versailles today…

But then I slept until 18h, so this I'll have to do.

RER C as Versailles…Réduire )



This was going to be a Facebook status…

Been awake (yay insomnia!) remembering my last 7-8 months at that international assurance company (who shan't be named), and how much I hated walking in to those buildings every day.

With redundancies and a new job that was destined for another round of them. The stress and the impending feeling of doom each day.

But then I remember, it got me off my ass to do something. All the negatives from that place spurred on one big positive move and experience.

Now here I am, writing this a year away from when it all started, in an amazing city. Somewhere I'm happy to be and a job with a lot more opportunities; than hoping upon the gods that they'd choose you to pay off with a redundancy payment.

It also got me to take a part-time (which turned in to a second full-time) job for a large supermarket chain, where I worked with some amazing people. We had laughs, random events and a series of unforgettable times.

All of which renewed my aspirations, goals and well-being. It also showed that I'm not made for the hum-drum life of being boxed in to an open plan office, filling in spreadsheets to justify my own existence.

I dearly miss those people and not just the ones I worked with daily, but all the stores I worked in the area over my time with them.

But with that loss came the greatest gain of them all; and nothing can take that from me or them knowing the important roles they played in it.

So if you're reading this down in the dumps, not too sure what's happening with you. Just remember, sometimes we all need that situation to make us remember what we want and to make us change what is around us.

Same can be said for getting in to two car accidents and becoming an invalid for three months. (Sometimes that life changing moment is a vauxhall vectra van).

As the old saying goes, when life gives you lemons, smash a glass in its face and squeeze the fuckers in to the wounds. Or something to that effect.

So this post is to all those people I know, keep up the crazy and don't let life screw with you too much!

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