Кевин (mmn) wrote,

My lady lumps, check it out.

So it’s been a long long time since I’ve sat down to actually get around to writing a proper blog entry, I really need to be doing this more as quite frankly it’s a bit sad to have the best domain in the world and not use it to it’s full potential of internet evils.

We all know the FSG Rumour Mill has kept on top of my dramatic life and just about anything that has anything to do with anything. First of all my Craig situation, I love the kid but I can’t keep going with it, it’s a bitch and it hurts. He’s lovely, he’s ace but he’s not going to be my bizzatch ever and that makes the baby jesus cry. But we live, we move on and kill those in our paths.

The other situation that has properly blown up is my Matt and that well kicked off on my birthday, somehow, I’m sure just about anybody in the rumour mill knows what’s going on but I’m keeping my trap shut about it. Don’t get me wrong Claire was like “you’re the first person to be on top of all that” and she isn’ wrong, with our Carrie off having mini-me the mill is going a bit dry, so the vicious bitch over here is spreadin’ and stirin’ to make up for it. But that business, is nobody’s business and it’ll stay that way. Probably because I love Matt in that not so “I want down your Y fronts” way, in fact if it wasn’t for that cracking ass of his I think I’d like him to be family. But I’m afraid that’s an ass that won’t stop, so we can’t be doing the genetic thing and staring at it when it comes in to view.

During the week various things happened, really I should state that I need internets at work to give you the LIVE ACTION NEWS, but everytime I do I get told “OK YEAH” and it goes LOL ACCESS DENIED on me. But most memorable are:

Saturday Morning: One of our clients who have an accident rating HIGHER than the amount of vehicles they own, one of their drivers called in to say his NSF window was smashed in. This is not an issue, hey, I can even do this shit in my sleep, except he’s in France. No problem I think, I’ll just call Autoglass, they’ll do me some glass. Wrong. We had to call CARGLASS. Oh the fun we had.

The conversation went:
Me: Bonjour, parlez-vous l’anglais?
Her: Desole, je ne comprehendre pas l’anglais.
Me: Uh, Does anybody parlez-vous l’anglais?
Her: Non, Une moment, attendre a’ligne…..

Then I got passed to some woman who wanted to arrange an intervention…. oh well.

We got somebody else involved and that went equally as bad with CARGLASS, but finally our MD who although Italian and increadibly scary (it’s the mafia connections I’m sure) speaks fluent French. Even she can’t get Carglass to understand that we want GLASS IN TO CAR SO DRIVER VROOM VROOM TO ENGLAND. Idiots. So FAIL.

Saturday Afternoon: Me Tabs and Lisa went in the part bs to see Doomsday. INFO: BEST FILLUM EVAR. See it or die.

Sunday: Helped Vick move her stuff and a tellly. Her family are scary people (not the mafia connections). It was surreal. But at least I’m Vicky’s 3rd boyfriend. Although our sex life is non-existant and I’m horrid to her (but she loves it).

Anyways since the Fosters (or four cans I’ve just had is now setting in I shall go. See you my beetches.

Originally published at Кевин.com.ua. You can comment here or there.

Tags: uncategorized

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