December 15th, 2003

Ohh shiny things

I nicked this...

Answer this if your straight, why, it'll make me feel you finally have some idea of what I get asked all the time:

HETEROSEXUAL QUESTIONNAIRE

Many lesbians and gay men - in therapeutic situations as well as in the "outside world" - are put into situations where they have to defend their sexuality. This places a considerable burden on people who are frequently only wanting to deal with a relationship problem, "coming out" on the job or with family and friends, or some sexuality-related situation. To help non-gay people understand how it feels to be put into such a position, Alan K. Malyon, Ph.D., devised a questionnaire, parts of which are excerpted here. This questionnaire is based on "heterophobic" premises, rather than homophobic premisees, which exist chronically in our society.


1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual?

3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase you will grow out of?

4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of people of the same sex? Maybe you just need a positive gay experience?

5. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of a fear of rejection?

6. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that?

7. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual?

8. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react?

9. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you leave me alone, but why do so many heterosexuals try to seduce others into that orientation?

10. If you should choose to nurture children, would you want them to be heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face?

11. Most child molesters are heterosexual. Do you consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexuals? Heterosexual teachers, particularly?

12. Why must heterosexuals be so blatant, making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Can't you just be what you are and keep it quiet?

13. Heterosexuals always assign themselves such narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex roles. Why do you cling to such unhealthy role playing?

14. How can you have a fully satisfying deeply emotional or sexual experience with an opposite-sex person, when the obvious physical, biological, and temperamental differences are so vast? How can a man possibly understand what pleases a woman sexually - and vice-versa?

15. Heterosexual marriage has total societal support, yet the divorce rate continues to spiral. Why are there so few stable heterosexual relationships?

16. Since there are so few happy heterosexuals, techniques have been developed to help people change. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?

17. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist/counselor not to try to influence you toward his/her own sexual leanings?

18. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them heterosexual?

19. A disproportionate number of criminals, welfare recipients, and other irresponsible types are heterosexual. So why would someone hire a heterosexual in a responsible job?

20. Why are heterosexuals so promiscuous, always having "affairs", etc.?