Кевин (mmn) wrote,
Кевин
mmn

  • Mood:
The following are phrases I'm most likely to use in the next 5 years:

- Bullocks, I'm the Anti-Christ

- But officer, I swear I didn't see that motorway worker in the yellow jacket when I hit him with my car today at noon.

- (To a baliff over the phone) He no live here no more, we sell chinese food, you want kung pow chicken?

- Don't shoot, it was the old lady's gun! (to the armed officers shouting at me to drop the weapon and drop to the ground).

- Let me just get my ticket.... LOOK A DIVERSION!

- No matter what the CCTV footage may show, I didn't set fire to that petrol station.

- It may look like a Pugeot, but as the tax disc says it's a Vauxhall.

- OhmygodfuckinghellRUN!
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 1 comment